How to Talk to Your Doctor About ED

Dreading this conversation? You're not alone. But here's the thing: your doctor talks about erections multiple times a day. It's only awkward for you—not them. Here's how to get through it.

Remember This

"When patients are nervous about talking to me about their sex life, I reassure them that I have similar conversations at least five times a day." — Dr. Jack Campbell, Urologist

Why It Matters (Beyond the Obvious)

Yes, you want your erections back. But there's a bigger reason to bring this up:

ED Can Be an Early Warning Sign

Erectile dysfunction can predict cardiovascular problems as accurately as smoking, family history of heart attack, or high cholesterol. The same blood vessel issues that affect your heart affect erections—often years before a heart attack. Getting ED checked could literally save your life.

Beyond that, ED can also reveal: low testosterone, diabetes, medication side effects, or psychological factors worth addressing. It's not just about sex—it's about your overall health.

Exact Scripts to Start the Conversation

The hardest part is the first sentence. Here are options—pick whichever feels most natural:

"I've been having trouble with erections. Can we talk about it?"

"I'm having some issues in the bedroom I'd like to discuss."

"I've noticed changes in my sexual function and I'm concerned."

"I'm having difficulty getting/maintaining erections. What should I know?"

"I want to talk about a male health problem."

Pro tip: Practice saying it out loud before your appointment. It sounds silly, but rehearsing makes it much easier to actually say when you're in the room.

What Your Doctor Will Ask

Once you break the ice, your doctor takes over. Expect questions like:

•When did this start?
•Is it occasional or consistent?
•Can you get erections but not maintain them, or neither?
•Do you wake up with morning erections?
•What medications are you taking?
•Do you smoke, drink, or use recreational drugs?
•How's your stress level? Sleep? Mood?
•Any relationship issues or performance anxiety?

These questions might feel personal, but they help determine whether your ED is physical, psychological, or both—which directly affects treatment.

How to Prepare

Before Your Appointment

1. Track your symptoms: How often? When did it start? Is it situational?
2. List your medications: Including OTC, supplements, and recreational substances
3. Note your medical history: Heart disease, diabetes, surgeries, injuries
4. Write down your questions: Appointments are short—don't forget what you wanted to ask
5. Know your goals: What would you consider success? This helps guide treatment.

Questions to Ask Your Doctor

•What do you think is causing this?
•Do I need any tests (blood work, heart tests)?
•What are my treatment options?
•What are the side effects of ED medications?
•Are there lifestyle changes that could help?
•Could any of my current medications be causing this?
•Should I see a urologist or specialist?

Who to Talk To

Primary Care Doctor

A great starting point. They can evaluate, prescribe ED medications, and refer you to specialists if needed.

Best for: Initial evaluation, straightforward cases

Urologist

Specialist in the male urinary and reproductive system. Very experienced with ED—talks about it all day.

Best for: Complex cases, if PCP is uncomfortable, if you want a specialist from the start

If your doctor seems uncomfortable: Some primary care doctors aren't comfortable discussing sexual health. If you sense this, simply ask for a referral to a urologist. No explanation needed.

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What to Expect at the Appointment

1. Health history discussion — Your doctor will ask about symptoms, medical history, medications, and lifestyle.
2. Physical exam — May include checking your blood pressure, heart, and possibly your penis and prostate (brief and routine).
3. Lab tests (maybe) — Blood work to check for diabetes, heart disease, hormone levels, or other issues.
4. Treatment discussion — Your doctor will explain options and make a recommendation based on your situation.

Treatment Options They Might Recommend

•Oral medications: Sildenafil (Viagra), tadalafil (Cialis), vardenafil (Levitra)
•Lifestyle changes: Exercise, weight loss, quitting smoking, reducing alcohol
•Hormone therapy: If testosterone is low
•Medication adjustment: If a current medication is causing ED
•Therapy: If psychological factors (stress, anxiety, depression) are involved
•Other treatments: Injections, vacuum devices, implants (for more complex cases)

Key Takeaways

1. Your doctor isn't embarrassed — they talk about this all day
2. The hardest part is the first sentence — practice it beforehand
3. ED can signal other health issues — getting it checked is smart
4. Come prepared — symptom notes, medication list, questions
5. Treatment usually works — most men find a solution
6. You can ask for a specialist — urologists are very experienced with ED
7. Telehealth is an option — if in-person feels too awkward

Medical Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. ED can be a sign of underlying health conditions. Always consult a healthcare provider for proper evaluation and treatment.